Friday, February 4, 2011

Future Cops (1993)

Future Cops (Hong Kong, 1993) - Color, Director(s): Wong Jing
MPAA Rating: NR
Approx. 95 min.

Z-rating: 5 out of 5 stars

B-factor: 4 out of 5 stars

Let's be perfectly clear here, I'm going to be reviewing the Hong Kong comedy that borrows from the Street Fighter video game franchise so as not to be confused with the more recent Future X-Cops which, ironically enough, also stars Andy Lau. Another thing I feel I should mention is that this movie shares absolutely NOTHING in common with the Street Fighter franchise except for its characters. I know some of you horror freaks out there must already be wondering to yourself, "What the hell, man? What happened to refocusing on horror?"  I didn't forget, my main focus will still be horror movies because I absolutely LOVE them. The thing is, I try to keep my blog relevant to the world by keeping up with holidays and other events. This month being Black History Month prompted the reviews of Blaxploitation films and will bring more to come. I was going to try to keep with the horror theme by reviewing Tales from the Hood and Snoop Dogg's Hood of Horror but the thing is, today is Lunar New Year and we Chinese folks don't like to talk about horribly nasty things during the New Year. So in an attempt to keep up with tradition (and at the risk of losing readers), I'm going to review a comedy to keep things a little more... upbeat. Now, onward to the review!

Set in the far off distant future of 2043, where the police ride around on little Star Wars-esque personal speeder bikes that fire lazers, a team of evil doers are trying to spring their boss (M. Bison) from a maximum security prison before being stopped by the Future Cops!!!! A showdown occurs between Ken, Sagat, and E. Honda of the evil team and the good guys of Ryu, Guile, Dhalsim, and Vega. The Future Cops are able to prevent the prison break but are unsuccessful in capturing the rest of the clown posse, who jump back in time on some half-baked mission to assassinate the judge that sentences Bison before he ever becomes a judge. (a la Terminator) Vega, Guile, and Dhalsim are sent back in time to protect the judge but not before they're warned about how people in the 90's like to lie a lot(!) So to prevent them from falling prey to such bad habits, they are implanted with special devices that give them an electric shock whenever they lie. Ryu (played by Aaron Kwok) stays behind while the other three go back in time to find the judge when he was still just a kid. Flash back to 1993 and we are introduced to the main character (Dicky Cheung) in an awkward kid who's picked on at school by the school bully who also happens to come from a wealthy background. He isn't just picked on at school but also by his kid sister, Chun Li (played by the BEAUTIFUL Chingmy Yau), at home. The Future Cops arrive via lightning storm (also lifted from Terminator, only they're not naked when they arrive) and offer their assistance in getting the bully of his back if he'll help them ask around for the judge at school. They're successful for awhile before the Ken and his goons arrive to recruit the bully. The hunt is on for whoever the student will be that grows up to become the judge. Which side will find them first?

This is, without a doubt, one of the silliest movies I've ever seen. That's what makes it laugh out loud hilarious, it's completely outrageous and over-the-top silly with really fast-paced Canto dialogue. Everything under the sun is parodied from Super Mario Bros to Dragon Ball Z with a healthy dose of wacky Chinese humor. If you're expecting any kind of serious Street Fighter movie, you will surely be disappointed with this film. They were unable to get the license to use the characters so other than resembling them, they really don't have much in common with their video game counterparts. This is the first live-action movie to contain characters from the Street Fighter franchise though and something about the charm of this film makes this one of my absolute favorites. This film also has an all star cast including Jacky Cheung, Simon Yam, Billy Chow, Richard Ng, and many more!! I would highly recommend this film for a ton of good laughs and I think everyone should own a copy of this film... just because.

Nudity: None. Although in the arcade scene, Chun Li pops a sex pill from the future that makes her randy as a jackrabbit. Awesome.... awesome to the max.

Gore: None.

Awesome: While I wouldn't call this movie visually impressive, I would highly recommend this film for a ton of good laughs. Especially if you happen to be into the Street Fighter video game franchise and also speak Canto. I know it's probably not required that you speak Canto to enjoy this film but a lot of it really is lost in translation. (especially the quick dialogue)  Check out the trailer below, which is so long it might as well have been the whole movie.

1 comment:

  1. I like this movie! I think its in the box of movies I gave you! ANDY LAU!